I’m not a writer. I’ve always told myself that I’m a “terrible writer” and that I would never be gifted in it. This belief in myself has been there since I was in grade school. I remember this one time in second grade, my teacher wanted us to write a story about a time we went on vacation. I didn’t have any great story to tell, so I remember lying and said that my family went to Disney World. I knew nothing about Disney World, besides the fact I'd never been. Lying has never been my forte, so I didn’t know what to write - I was stuck. I was too embarrassed to let my teacher know that I lied, so that whole week I just dreaded writing time. I quickly found out that one lie, led to another lie, which led to another. Since then, this sense of dread pops up every time I try to write.
But what if I could be good at writing? Maybe I have believed something about myself that isn’t true. What if the reason I can’t write is from all the false lies I’ve told myself? Perhaps I never gave myself a chance. I also know there is a real chance that I’m not gifted in writing as well. But I’ve opened the door of “maybe” and maybe is a great place to start.
I’m also slightly feeling fear. I’m 33 years old and I’m embarrassed of others seeing my weakness in writing. I’m embarrassed because I believe I should be better. But this is where I am at. If you choose to join me in my journey of self-discovery, you might witness my transformation along the way whether in writing or something else. I hope that you are inspired to try something new - to be brave enough to let yourself be who you are right now, and to display your beautiful messy self to those around you.